“Get Rowdy and Live Dumb”

“Get Rowdy and Live Dumb”

You’ve got to love a guy who goes to a salon requesting a “blow-out” for his Jersey Shore themed Halloween costume. Everyone needs that outspoken, outgoing friend. I think his photo says it all. Meet Cody. He’s currently rocking the Seattle-tan and playing rec soccer, all while earning his living as a member of the IT crowd. From happy hours to hitting the ski slopes, Cody’s pretty cool to hang out with, as long as you don’t offer him processed foods. East-Coast “foodies” are the worst, am I right?

Q1: When you go out for spicy food with friends, they often ask you to rank it from “mild” to “burn your apartment down” heat, why is that?

A: Well two days after deciding to move to Seattle I was smoking my morning cigarette. When I was finished, I tossed it casually over the fence like I had done 1000 times before.  I was unemployed at the time and didn’t get a lot of sleep the night before so I tried to take a nap afterwards. Tossing and turning in my bed I hear people screaming “there’s a fire at 81 Washington”. So I think in my head, 81 Washington…81 Washington…hmmm…..That’s close to my house, WAIT! That IS my house!!! So I ran to the back where the fire/only exit to my apartment was located and there were flames all the way up to the bathroom window (I lived on the second floor of a two story house).  So I put on clothes grabbed a few key items, wallet, phone, keys, smokes (obviously…what’s more stressful than burning your house down) and went to the bedroom window which opened up onto a flat roof. The guy who alerted me that my house was on fire yells “You got to get outta there!” (Thanks for the sound advice genius; I thought I would stay in the burning building). I crawled through the window on to the roof. I then had to jump probably about a 14 foot gap (it was 10 feet maybe…) down to some grass to escape my burning apartment.

Did I get in trouble? No

Did my stuff get ruined? No

Did I get my security deposit back? I tried 🙂 my landlord was f%$&ing pissed though!

Check out a link to the local news article which basically calls me a giant moron.

http://www.lohud.com/story/news/local/westchester/north-castle/2014/03/27/man-escapes-north-white-plains-house-fire/6955299/

They also misquoted or got bad information. I didn’t throw my cigarette out the window that would be stupid!

I have since quit smoking…

Q2: Was this the reason you moved out West and settled in Seattle?

A: No, as I said before my wife and I had just decided like 2 days prior to move to Seattle. I was unemployed and she hated her job and we didn’t have anything super tying us down so we looked at a bunch of potential places to live and Seattle won. It’s slightly cheaper than NY with great career opportunities, and my brother lives here. My wife had never been here before, so we packed and just moved across the country. She took my word for it that Seattle was a cool place and she would like it. I proposed to her on the way out here to prove I wasn’t gonna bail on her after she decided to move out west with me!

Q3: You learned your lesson and switched from cigarettes to vape. What’s your favorite flavor (just assume you are being judged on your answer)?

A: I quit vaping too. When I was vaping, I started with this bourbony-like-oak-cask-aged sort of caramel flavor; I forget what it was called. My other favorite was unicorns blood, it tasted like fruit punch.

Q4: How do you like it here? What do you miss most about home?

A: I love it here! I say all the time if I could move all my friends and family out to Seattle I doubt I would leave. The food and drinks are top notch in Seattle. Most places I go don’t seem too crowded, s%&t is a little expensive going out but it’s hard to complain because the quality is so consistently good. I definitely miss my family and my friends from home; $300 for a 6 hour plane ride is brutal. Also tomatoes…the tomatoes here suck.

Q5: How would you describe New York Pizza? Similar to Sbarro?

A: Sbarro is cardboard garbage; I bet it didn’t even originate in NY. WOW, I just googled it and it did…shameful! NY pizza to start with is huge. It has a thin crispy crust and you should be able to hold it with one hand without it flopping over. NEVER eat it with a knife and fork. Also its cheap. The “pizza” places (just kidding there is some great pizza in Seattle) out here have this insane idea that pizza should cost between $16 and $20  and then they show up with this tiny looking little pie that wouldn’t even fill my wife up. If, (and this is a big IF), you manage to find a place that sells slices they run you between $4 and $6…a slice…for some mediocre dollar slice bullshit pizza. I remember back in the day you could get the Ivanas special in my home town which was 5 bucks for 2 slices AND a can of soda, it was also the best pizza in town. This may have been 15 years ago…

Q6: You were born and raised in New York, what selection of beer do you prefer to dump on Red Sox fans as they visit Yankee stadium?

A: Yankee Stadium is tough. I generally go to the beers of the world stand because at least there is some variety and you can get a decent beer with alcohol content of more than 3%. Bro I’m not paying f%$&ing $11 for a Coors light I would be broke before I started to get a decent buzz. Ummmm…Stella? I guess if I had to choose a beer from Yankee stadium it would be Stella….their beer selection is bad

Q7: As a New Yorker, which Sex in the City character do you most identify with?

A: That sexy brunette one, because she’s hot. Those movies were the most god-awful-pieces-of-crap I’ve ever seen also and I’ve only seen the first one. It’s like a giant-product-placement-cash-in on a series that should have died years before a movie came out. Unbearable!

Q8: I know you’re not much a beer drinker anymore, so what are you drinking to stay hydrated these days?

A: Vino! I love drinking wine. I used to not like wine until I went to Italy and tried it there. It was like a light clicked on like oh….this is what wine is supposed to taste like wow! Also mescal is my liquor of choice. That stuff is delicious and the cocktails they make with it in Seattle are outstanding. Mescal with citrus serrano peppers and egg whites was what I had with brunch yesterday out of this world. I like getting a good buzz going and I just get too full on beer, how can I eat a ton of food and drink a ton of beer? Less liquid equals less full, I still love the taste of beer.

Q9: When you do drink, you like to celebrate with karaoke. Tell us about your go-to song?

A: “Kiss from a Rose” by Seal. It was actually the first song I remember seeing on MTV and loving! I used to be too shy to perform karaoke in front of people, so I would only do private rooms or this one golf course club house with an audience of maybe 12 on a good night. One night I tried out as a duet “Kiss from a Rose” with one of my buddies and all I kept thinking is how terrible the other guy singing was and that I actually sounded pretty good. So I guess that was the start of my solo career.

Q10: Anything else you want to tell your readers?

A: I had a boss one time who gave me great advice. If you want something or want to do something but it’s “too expensive” or “not a good time” just do it. You are only young once and you can’t take your money with you. Experiences will always be more valuable than possessions. Get rowdy and live dumb!

 

 

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